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Yesterday was a tough day, the due date of the baby that I lost in October at 9 weeks. Don’t worry, I’m not going to bother you all with tales of the despair that a woman who miscarries feels nor how insensitive some people can be (though I should. It seems that few people realize how frequent miscarriage is. Some say up to one in three pregnancies end that way, but it often happens before the woman even realizes she was pregnant in the first place.). Instead I’ll tell you a bit about what I did for a little emotional healing.
After losing a baby, many women feel the need to do something to remember it by. Some get a tattoo, others plant a tree or flowers. I’ve never been able to choose a tattoo that I would like to have for the rest of my days and I was worried that a plant could die on me. So I thought a bit. One of the things that I was saddest about was that I really would like for my daughter to have a sibling, someone to play with. So yesterday I sewed a doll for her. I bought the “John” pattern from the Etsy seller Bit of Whimsy Dolls, a PDF pattern, which is great because there’s no need to mail it. I’d never made a doll in my life, but the instructions were really easy and it only took a few hours. I’d never embroidered either, for that matter, but I must say that I found it quite relaxing and I’d like to try more of it in the future.